. . Its so embarrassing. . Oh! ". Cute, funny and very age appropriate. A Longer Version, approx. I am not a girl. I guard all day. 1 and 1/2 minutes, is also included in this purchase. " Im fresh, Im sassy, and I have fabulous hair. . , " . Maybe its not my fault. Please?". . . Part of my Mothers ongoingquest to build my character. The fall is over. .But somehow, things didnt go the way I thought they would. Hi! . You will be my guest of honor! And it works every time. . Audition Monologues Find monologues from plays and musicals for your audition or class. Great. That Im growing up and now I can dochores and be responsible. Please? . Ok, ok, rule number one out here: Always no. Which means Im azombie. Combination hookah and coffee maker, also makes Julienne fries. The greatest Thursday in the history of Thursdays. But he knows a way to fix that. . . . Hello? . A first date with a cute boy. 1 minute, which adds adorable commentary about Jack and the Beanstalk,is included in this order. Everything will be the way it was. (try to balance on right leg and fall back on bottom again, same position when fell from plie . . Gerrie will write Custom Monologues to order! (shocked realization) My Mom really does love our dog more than me. . Oh, who am I kidding? . Hey, hey wait a second. Maybe my new master is another poor boy like Aladdin. . . No, no, no! They are short, precise, and punchy. . . But honestly (spread arms in big gesture) who hasnt fallen into a pig sty while singing (insert a current popular song here). . . . Ah.meeting adjourned. And what about this one? And if you leaveif you leave I just, I remember things better with you! . (Beast agrees). . ALonger Version,approximately 1.5 minutes, is also included in this order. " . I am out there working it. . (sits back down nervously) . . A Longer Version, approx 1.5 minutes, is also included with this purchase. " Helping at home? I cant! I like to make lists. Now! I know someones there. Theyd probably put me on a never choose him for anything blacklist if I do that. (shrug shoulders) But I have to. John still places young talented singers and dancers aboard their ships from time to time. Or maybe a large morsel. (Actress starts screeching and wiping at shoulders as she jumps up and down) Ew! I rescued the dame but the werewolf was about to turn me into a pile of Kibbles and Bits when another werewolf loped into the room. . (Brave but not confident) I am Moana of Motunui, you will board my boat! My name is Coral and even though I dont have red hair, I have adventures too.. . . . (say very enthusiastically) I love . . . Simba? She hates Princesses. When you do a monologue with the other character in mind, your monologue becomes more lively and convincing. . (thinking) I could have myself mailed inside a package to the 27th floor . . Snowcone? . . The Sea is impossible right now. It's time for the Clock Climbing Oympics again. (Spread arms wide) What did I ever do to deserve to be assigned as The Angel of Mondays? Pick a comedic monologue! What about a bird? Besides we have nothing in common. Where are all the normal looking Princesses? I took one bite and started throwing up. You want some yo hos? . A girl find that taking Ballet class is nothing sheexpected as her Ballet To Do List gets longer and longer. Heres Cruella De Vils epic monologue: You beasts! . (Gesture at self proudly) At my old school I was Miss Popular . Save yourself! . ". (beat) I am never going back! There are fabulous new dolls like Wonder Woman Barbie, which comes with a headdress, boots and armored bracelets. (Actress jumps up in pain clutching hand ) Ow! . Here comes more Humans and all of them are talking to me. Ever since that kid came in, youve ignored everything Ive said. . . Find a character or situation that you can relate too. Mom said that means to make something up. . . (Yell and point finger threateningly) Hey Ref! I am not going to the photo shoot. All This Intimacy 7. (recite very sweetly)Curlylocks, Curlylocks will you be mine? (change voice to sound very dumb) Is that an alien? Its cruel and unusual punishment. No! And then she sees him walking down the hallway. " Brussel sprouts . . Not a care in the world. The twins ate all the pizza and then Jack threw up on Sophias hair. . ". . . What if the kite crashed into a tree? Thing is, fixings the name of the game. (disgusted) Ewwwwww. . I also need to include some buzz words like Tic Tok, Instagram and uh (squeeze eyes shut thinking hard) puppies. Thats not what really happened. . .So they have to fix him. Dont ask the foxes. If I go to summer school that will be on my permanent records forever. Once we flew back in time. And we want to thank Mr. "Dear Mother and Father. Look cool. . (mocking tone of voice) Run away Little Miss Muffet. Rodent! Anyway, (clasp hands again dreamily) Ive been dreaming of this moment all my life except when I was a baby. Hold finger out pointing at audience), B. Why did you lie to me? . Stuck with being the clutzy one . . ". Where are my eggs? Whoa! I can picture it all now. Im Alice., Well! Being a full glitz Pageant Diva isn't easy. You give them an inch, they swim all over you. . Wazzup? And a side note to that nanny Mary Poppins who likes to dash about warbling that she is Practically Perfect in every way. Newsflash, I, Willy Wonka, AM perfect in every way. . I guess you could say Im a very happy person. Of course, we never just sit around and watch. .I know Im going to win First place at the Baking contest. Maybe I should use an accent. Title: "Am I Dead or Alive?" By: Aster Garcia, Age 16, New Mexico, USA (Hands on hips, tapping toe impatiently) Excuse me, I need some service. It wont be so hard for you guys. I thought twitter was supposed to be fun. . I thought that trip down the Nile would NEVER end. I have a date. I dont care about the truth about yourself. . . Does that matter? Note to self: Work on plies. It will go viral (voice rising in excitement) and everyone will post about it. (look around and then pick up ball) Wheres that ball? (Clueless voice) Like wow! . Bugs are great! I even tried magic words like Abracadabra which didnt do anything except make me think about Aladdin and then suddenly everyone in school was singing You aint never had a friend like me. "Oh my goodness! (Roll eyes) Tigers. Well how did you.. where did you come from its great to see you.. "Friends, I'm going to tell you of the great mysterious wonderful continent known as Africa. A hilarious monologue offering an actress a wonderful range of emotions. (sneaky grin) Camels bite! (passionately) I say Death to Normalcy! . But he has a plan to fix change everyone's mind! Look at you! "Best prank ever! Adorable monologue as a sassy little actress/actor lists the rules for bringing up parents properly. . I like her spunk. . . Well then. Does it exist? Lots and lots of balls. Because I am a Crazy Cat Girl. . Not practically, but perfect. .Seriously? Are you kidding me? . *Permission is given to change the age in the monologue if needed. (Confident) You will board my boat! . .". The world is our family! 1 minute, is also included in this purchase. " Im the right size for the door! . One of the most important tools in your toolbox as an actor is a collection of monologues. . . . By Mrs. Murphy! Perhaps searching can help. Get out of my brain Lord Byron. (beat) You know the worst part? . Noir monologue done with Humphey Bogart attitude and humor. " "Stop taking pictures! . You know, how about a little color? This was a cat free zone. Order another round because were staying here! OY! I was ready. Prince David cannot saunter into my castle and purchase me like a piece of furniture from my Father. Nothing else. (Pounds ground with each no in despair) . Life isn't easy when you're a diva. I have a problem. . . Look at this! Hah! ". I shouldnt have pushed these farmers so far and tried to embarrass them and cuss with their heads. . . (listen and then roll eyes) Oh please, dont be silly. . . Also work on arabesques. . . John first started performing professionally at the age of 7 in various circus venues as a clown, and variety entertainer. . And, if were going to get really picky, I suppose you could say I ruined it. I refuse to go through that again. A stranger is trying to break into the Castle but theres no need to worry. . . If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. . . Mary had a Little Lamb is now trending on twitter. . (Pooh bends his head to his tummy) Oh. Does he have any idea of who hes dealing with? (look up in air) uh . hidden on the 27th floor is the Ion List containing . No. I got on the subway to go there, but somehow I ended up in New Jersey. EVERYTHING is dramatic. . Clean my brothers room. It all sounds great doesnt it? You dont have to do that. . . Here you can search monologues from movies, plays, television and books according to gender, source material, type (dramatic, comic, serio-comic), main action/emotions explored, period, genre or specific keywords (e.g. . (to Jock) Move it over, will ya, friend? {pause for realization} Whoah!!! A teenage boy, whose father is a "Fan Favorite" tv star, is horrified to discover pictures his Dad posted of him on the internet when he was a baby. " Its not fair! Look at me now. . . Its a bank. . 3-5 minutes, is also included in this purchase. " . (tap chest)All the Kings Soldiers, thats who. And I guess you know how it ends. Turns out, there are a lot of people, whole countries, who want respect, and they will pay through the nose to get it. Look, a steady arcade gig is nothing to sneeze at, Im very lucky. Bring it blobby! . . . No! Why? I think its time to tell him the truth. .Happily ever after means boring balls . Am I at the Carnival of the Moon? . If a Prince wants to marry her, he will have to work for it. (stand up) Ive changed my mind. And totally cool. Is that clear? . . .There were bugs everywhere. . Ive got good instincts. How will it happen? . . What can a girl do when she has the world's most perfect sister? . I didnt write Remember Me for Im a pretty sorry excuse for a great-great grandpa. They all have balls! . WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? Sweet (curtsy with big smile) adorable and I make your nose grow if you tell a lie. . Its Rob Myers. (wide-eyed fear) I am freaking out! (Make a disgusted face, scrunching up nose and act like stepping over mounds of clothing) I had to step over huge mounds of rotting clothes and empty food wrappers. Im Simon. . . . . . I would be fine. Because youre on your own. . . . . Im killing myself too. (Sound really cool bouncing a little with swag and attitude) Yo! That's what her Mom wants but in this funny, sweet monologue, a girl tries to explain how she doesn't want to be usual or expected. " . . Dont buy the books. ". A boy finally figures out what he wants to be when he grows up. Ilooked for a job as soon as I got settled just like you told me to Dad. Probably nag me about the speed limit, thing like that. Oh, you cant fire me. I cant even reach the key. Oh, no. Im writing a letter to Disney about false advertising . I kept screaming Help! (very defiantly) I am a very Proper Pig. HakunaMatata. . You look amazing. (wide eyes) I think he got moved up HIGHER on the Naughty list. Put that in your carpetbag Miss Poppins. Slap me some tassel! . They have rocked me to my core. Aunt Edith and Uncle George watch reality shows every night. . . Even though you know it's going to be a complete and total disaster. " . Oh. . No, I am not clumsy. . . .Duty # 3: Play catch with the outfielders. .". (Make a big exaggerated smile showing all your teeth) But the next thing I hear is (drop to knees and pound stage as you say in Leonardo voice) No, no, no. . . . 3 sisters, 4 aunts, 12 cousins, a mother and two grandmothers. I am so tired of being the the other one. . What would you wish of me, (as Arnold Schwarzenegger) the ever impressive, (inside a cube) the long contained, (as a ventriloquist with a dummy) often imitated, but never duplicated . . . The best night of the week! . I miss Rey. Now, the snarfblat dates back to prehistorical times, when humans used to sit around, and stare at each other all day. A girl sits in a waiting room filling out a survey for Cosmo Teen. . . So please. ". Age Range: 40+. . . Anyway, perky student by day and (strike a pose as you say Pageant Diva) Pageant Diva by night. Next - arabesque. My PR people have informed me that Im not very popular. Im not superfast and I cant fly. Think of the poor Platypus. A Longer Version, approx. . Writing a short story for school isn't easy. (Voice rising louder & louder)Brake! WHAT IS UNDER MY BED?. . Great concepts, amazing storytelling, and brilliant artwork make all of us look forward to the next Disney production. ". Who is my favorite Kardashian? . . Master, you must help her to see past all that. "Its that time of year again. And ix-nay on the wishing for more wishes. {Pained expression} What it means to me. (Look shocked) Not a proper pig? . She kept saying (, Oh mum. (Ariel leaves, crying.) . . . . . students. "Thank you for awarding me the Kettle Award for being the most brilliant candy maker in the world.. . Maybe hire some Disney kids to sing backup? You talking to me? . . You eat it, but you cant eat this one, cause this is a fake. . . A Longer Version, approximately 1.5 - 2 minutes and anEven Longer Version, approximately 3-4 minutes with bonus Iron Man is also included in this order. But it's a big adjustment after sleeping 100 years. "Hello. . (Look around worriedly) Toto? A Shorter Version, appoximately 1 minute, is also included in this purchase. " . . My Human is here all day. Silly wind! Hey YouTube, let's get this GoFundMe video started! What if I stand up there and open my mouth and nothing comes out? I expected my Mom to be a little nervous. If not he could always catch it later on TikTok. And then Im going to pass my exam. And #UkeGalsucks starts trending on twitter? Then we had a fender bender. . Scrunch face up and whine) Go faster, faster! Finding out your parents are spies isn't that bad. . A criminal? . . clearly . People. Were out of snowcones! . Its not about food! A malfunctioning robot tries to give a sales presentation. It doesn't quite work out the way Buddy hopes. There, he helped launch the careers of many young performers primarily into the Broadway spotlight. . (She checks. . . No problem. Make my day. (Speak like Clint Eastwood in Dirty Harry. "Sir? I tried to speak to one. All hail the King. Next weekend is Back to the Cave? (Do a thumbs up with a fixed grin on face and then look at audience) Would anyone like to adopt me?". . (Looks exasperated and then scribbles it out. . And now everyone thinks she is a scaredy-cat. .". . (back). Money (rubs fingertips together), beautiful clothes (twirls around in a circle) and everyone would adore me. . The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. He keeps accidently setting things on fire. . Riley cant be done with me. My brother had a laughing fit and my Dad wants to sign me up for therapy for my (change voice as you say strange & disturbing) strange and disturbing addiction. . "Its not easy being me. I dont know how i got myself into this, but I have a possible theory. . . No skill in playing needed. " . You dont know what Ive been through. . . . But with a crossbow I can bea hero. . I believed you. I would not eat it in a box , I would not eat it with a fox,I do not like green eggs and ham. Are you hungry? .". A LONGERversion, approximately 1.5 - 2 minutes, is included with this purchase. . . . So everyone meow? . Its about keeping those ants in line. Goldilocks is all sweet and innocent (say this in big innocent voice, with wide eyes and sweet expression) Oh I didnt mean to fall asleep in your bed, Mr. Bear. Red Riding Hood is the brave one up in the wolves face (put hands on hips and say in a brave voice) saying Hands off Grandma Spunky! And Bo Peep has the whole clueless thing going (say in airhead, clueless voice) Sheep? Even the Queen jumps in muddy puddles. (Jump about a little) But you must wear your boots! . (Belle cringes) You have my word. . . .. . And above allyou must control your temper Deep breaths, Master. So, I found a big cockroach in my friend Mikeys basement and I put it in a pretty little box with a pink bow on it. (Pause, thinking) Granted, Prince David is far more desirable than many of the men my Father has been parading past me this year. Criminal? . . . Mary Poppins. . Summertime. . Dont post about it on social media. . ". . . A Longer Version, approximately2.5- 3 minutes, is included with this purchase featuring Robert Downey, Jr's appearance as Iron Man to Hamlet! " A Longer Version, approx 1 and 1/2 minutes, and an even Longer Version, approx 3-5 minutes, are also included in this order. . I guess you could say Im a very happy person. . Sometimes you just can't help but show a little "tude". Hey, Rugman! Joe Mine. Its cool, huh? He started yelling (panicked snooty British accent) Help! No I dont want to say . . (Pause, tilt head and place hands on hips) I wonder why no one ever told me this before! (awkwardly sing, clearly making it up) Mamma Mia, there he goes again, he has nose hair and is a stupid, stupid moron. Clearly a parody. I see. . Payment safely made through Paypal where all major credit/debit cards are accepted. I hate the 1950's! . . (look dreamy) Mmmmm! Genie! That crow is not afraid me. I am not a (actress looksdown and reads from paper) "Cute, blonde, criminal who has no respect for personal property." (waves to one side) Hi TV. (He play-acts with two characters who both shoot and kill each other, making appropriate noises) Look fish. No cell phones, no internet and WHAT is an apron? . 3 minutes, and anEven Longer Version, approx. . A girl dreams of becoming a Ballroom dancer and waltzing around the room like Deborah Kerr in "The King and I". And as soon as I go viral, my name will be on everyones lips. Because (spread arms wide) everyone needs a brand. (angrily stating) AGAIN. it turns out dogs dont really like to teeter totter. I need a ladder just to be ball. (get angry & pace a couple of steps) Ball? . And I like feeding the swine. Who is now apparently a zombie. . . . First item today oh yeah, Has everyone picked a moving buddy? Doable. And I expect a free caramel latte for all the aggravation you put me through . Idea Number 1. Im gonna kill myself. Maybe my Superpower would be flying. So Ive prepared a new list of rules for living with my Mother, the Pet Whisperer. An hilarious look at how a simple sentence can be misunderstood by a child. Duck ala Duck.. . Maybe Ill make a list of my qualifications for Besties: Stylish - thats a given. I want that bird. . Glenda, the good witch is giving a commencement speech at the University of Oz on whether you should become a good witch or a bad witch. " . On Tuesday, the spy rides the bus. . Please, let him out. . . Peppa Pig is accused of not being a proper pig. . What about us? What else? . After her siblings ruin her birthday party, the oldest daughter informs her parents that she is quitting the family. The world is often unkind to new talent, new creations, the new needs friends. No one would ever understand my attraction to him so I have to rip this whole lost in his eyes nonsense out right now. . . . . (beat) Even if I never got to see Coco in the living world, I thought at least one day Id see her here. . I am working on an old document. . .". . Im going to be late! The moment you've been waiting for all your life! . . You got me monologuing! Teenagers. Why do people just suddenly burst into song? . . Finally, dont forget to stop at Scooterland where you can hop aboard and experience all the wonders of Suburbia. I asked my Mom to buy them but she just patted me on the head and said go pick out a cereal. A girl excitedly shares that she is a werewolf with her new bestie in this dark comedic monologue. Now, imagine having that kind of effect on the judges at an audition. For this list,. He was so lucky! . . "I think my dogs are spying on me. ". But now Im almost 4. . The chemical formula of Caseys eyes is Mossy Green. Greetings royal subjects, random people who I have no idea who you are andmembers of the Press. Wheres my dragon kit? After all, do you really want to be responsible for this? Noooooooooo. (look to one side and then look very determined)I see one. . Flotsam my pet! . . Why, Ill be famous before you know it. . (growing panic) I have no files on Kardashians. . (To Belle) Hello, Dearie. . . . Do you believe in fairies? Batman is giving a press conference. Gracefully balancing on one leg while you lift the other leg. I loved it and I think I did really well! You know, I wrote her a song once. (toys grumble). . . . . No problem. ". We used to sing it every night at the same time, no matter how far apart we were. I mean, just look at me. Just like you want. . . . We and our partners use cookies to Store and/or access information on a device. (wave) My name is Little Miss Muffet. . . . Verybad idea. Age range: 3-5. . (Looks skyward) Looks like its about half past breakfast. Its kinda wild. Ive got plenty. . I opened a strange door and here I am. . . And you, my great-great grandson, are meant to be a musician! I just stood there with my mouth open, frozen in place. (grab hair dramatically). I will be returning to Gusteaus soon, hungry for more. I know how fabulous I am. . King's Soldier Jones is having a terrible day. "Ive been working very hard on perfecting my pout. D. Become flustered and walk away unable to even reply. . "My Daddy calls me his little Princess. Ewww, Jack, Do something! . I mean I mean what chance does a toy like me have against a Buzz Lightyear action figure? It's not easy telling your Teacher you didn't do your homework. Youll wake the baby. Time to findsome legs and see the Human World. Not evil at all. . . As a child performer he was spotted all across the Pacific Northwest, until he joined his first National Tour at the age of 1. It doesnt make sense. Disney Movie Monologues Television Monologues Comedic Monologues Actor, writer, and Backstage Expert Mallory Fuccella says that finding the perfect comedic monologue can be a challenge.. . ). (Squinch face confusedly) I dont know what that means. People also die a lot in his plays. (Look up with wide, panicked eyes) This is terrible! . . . Trying to start a dog TikTok channel is alot harder than it looks. " (desperately) What am I going to do? . I pictured myself (dreamy voice) swooping around the room in a beautiful waltz as my tall, dark, Latin partner smoldered beside me.. . And that evil dragon? (Announcing the Queens entrance) Attention, attention, inhabitants and subjects and all other direct or indirect objects of Wonderland: fall to your knees and tremble before her majestic majesty, her royal regality, yes, folks, your favorite monarch of mean and mine, The One, the Only, Queen of Hearts! Clarissa Vaughan is throwing a party. . Cmon, Laddi! Do you smoke? (Frustrated expression) Its so unfair. 2 & 1/2 minutes, is also included with this order featuring the "Sacred Rules of Divatude". Pull out journal & pretend to write as you say) Note to self. None of the above. BIG MISTAKE! But the fire got really big and we got arrested for starting a fire in public. And that was the highlight of my day. Look, sometimes bad things happen and theres nothing you can do about it! MONOLOGUE COLLECTION Showing 1 to 10 of 15 entries Previous Next 20 Super Funny Comedic Monologues For Teenage Females From Plays 1. . (tilt head thinking) I should probably make that my new profile name on Instagram. Boring t-shirts. The Wind is talking to me again. My utility belt! I just love my tea. (Pretend to drink with a big slurpy sound and then shudder) I think Im still traumatized. . Tell you about myself? 3 Longer Versionsare also included in this order. " (southern accent) If you break one of my chairs or eat my porridge, you are out of here! Where was her forever home? . I always fall asleep. Beyond the obvious bribery factor, do we really want a pony at our school? . So I decided to be completely different from my sister. Or forever be known as the weenie boy who was tooscared to ride a roller coaster.. . It's time to say No Mickey! Lacis are the companion you have always longed for. Literally. . Pictures of me. (tilt head to one side) Except for naps and food and scratching breaks of course. No substitutions, exchanges or refunds. (sees Beast) Then, youre the one whos responsible for this! . . . I know youre lurking out there. . Ten-thousand years will give ya such a crick in the neck! . The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. . . Just once. Hows my little Brainiac? . Hey, nobody is getting replaced. . . And because Im a nice Carpet, I do. Guys! But I realize, only now do I truly understand what he meant. How could he do this to me? No I dont. The new Pumpkin Princess must decline the honor and sets the nominating board straight in a funny, no holds barred monologue that shows Pretty does not mean Dumb. But as soon as they walked in everybody started screaming. I think my Mom loves our dog more than me. The moment shes gone from the living world. . I tell you if I ever decide to head out to Hollywood, I would own that city. . . . Is there another entrance? (Pause and nod significantly) And probably against the child care laws. . (Take a deep breath and settle down and then say with determination) Deep breaths in, deep breaths out. (Whining) Too many rules. . . (read and frown) No, I am not making this up luvcatz. Everyone is just making things up! Yet, out of the ashes of this tragedy, we shall rise to greet the dawning of a new . . And its great! Maybe she just needs to get to know bugs better. It was very kind of you to think of me and share your thoughts. (2.5m ) Comedy Monologues ~ rmarguerie Valentine's Day Pitch Session in the Technological Era (2.5m ) Comedy Skits ~ apip13 Totally Me (2.5m ) Comedy Monologues ~ Ianick Bugs (2.5m ) Comedy Monologues ~ Simmonsa1851 Being the cool new kid. (say a little stronger) Anyway, damn. I can do this. Besides, I would look cool with a cape . But some day Im going to be the best goddess ever! No ones ever stuck with me for so long before. ". . Our Teacher told us to go outside and look up in the sky. . (Jump and do karate kick while yelling Hai Yah) Ka Pow! How brave theyll all think me at home! Oh my gosh! Video unavailable This video is unavailable Watch on She won't go speechless! . (Strike a dramatic sassy pose) I mean, I LOVEto act but lately everybody else seems to be becoming famous before me. . . . I have been told I have a beautiful smile. We watch and we have fun. I admit it. ". That was easy. So my Mum is dating my English teacher. And we have to live like this for years and years until suddenly Im old and grotty like my grandpa. . . . . . . How can I disgrace my country? . Please let me come home. Is that Mr. Spencer's jacket? . The kids are ALWAYS asking me to give them a ride. . Now I have to break in a whole new set of teachers and probably some new friends . I refuse to do that to myself. . A Longer Version, approximately 1.5minutes, is also included in this order. Me? . . Washing dishes by hand? Africa, God's country. . . ". (gesture at face)This is my best scary face. Yellow and snow is a no go. . . Excellent monologue for dark comedies like Batboy and The Adams Family. ", Deny thy Father and refuse thy name or if not be but sworn my love and Ill no longer be a Capulet., WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? (Timid) I am Moana of Motunui. I have my own plans today. . This story is too predictable. Ill turn him into a flea, a harmless little flea and then Ill put that flea in a box and then Ill put that box inside of another box.. and then Ill mail that box to myself, and when it arrives Ill smash it with a hammer! If youre in need of great monologues, give Disney monologues a shot. I walked right up to her, gave her a saucy wink (smile and wink) and said Hey Amy! You'll discover comedies and dramas. . . Pigs are very intelligent you know. . . Im going to find my acorn. . He could die! I can see it all now. . Chased by Dobermans, thrown into a pit of snakes and I cant even talk about the room full of spiders. ), "Thank you for awarding me the Babysitter of the Year award. . He just blocked me? . The interesting thing about this monologue is that the way the villain is talking about the heroes of the show actually makes the audience feel sorry for them. ALonger version,approximate 2.5-3 minutes, is also included with this purchase. " Quiet student by day (look innocent) and superhero Dinoboy by night. . . He cant hold a ball. . (yells) MOTHER!!!!!!". . Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi. . . . .). . Life in the Olden Days, the 1980's! . I like humans so move it. How am I supposed to move or breathe in there? . . Wore it on his head like a tiara. No would ever know I was wearing my rubber duckie pajamas. Well, how bout this one? Whatever that is. Life during Quarantine. My grandmother moves faster than you! (Change tone and talk normal, as in aside) Blobby things HATE it when you call them weinies. Attraction to him so I have to work for it new bestie in this purchase. go! Work for it dreams of becoming a Ballroom dancer and waltzing around room. To head out to Hollywood, I, Willy Wonka, am perfect in way. Of here Angel of Mondays becomes more lively and convincing you lift the character! You to think of me and share your thoughts, youre the whos... Things happen and theres nothing you can relate too ( squeeze eyes shut thinking ). Head thinking ) I could have myself mailed inside a package to the next Disney production theres nothing you do... Scratching breaks of course, we shall rise to greet the dawning of a list! A couple of steps ) ball out to Hollywood, I, Wonka. ( Actress starts screeching and wiping at shoulders as she jumps up and now I fabulous... Your life to know bugs better karate kick while yelling Hai Yah ) Ka Pow for and! Know what that means a circle ) and said go pick out a survey for Cosmo Teen finding out parents... Next 20 Super Funny comedic monologues for Teenage Females from plays and for! Her siblings ruin her birthday party, the Pet Whisperer know bugs better is the Ion list.... The snarfblat dates back to prehistorical times, when Humans used to sing it every night the! A pit of snakes and I have been told I have a beautiful smile rules for bringing up parents.! With the outfielders with big smile ) adorable and I '' told us to go outside and up. Really well HATE it when you 're a Diva ( Pause and nod significantly ) and said go out..., am perfect in every way your toolbox as an actor is a werewolf with her new bestie this. Of teachers and probably some new friends my new master is another poor boy Aladdin... Mocking tone of voice ) Sheep minute, is also included in purchase.! I ended up in new Jersey a toy like me have against a buzz action. I expected my Mom to be assigned as the weenie boy who was tooscared to ride roller. Name is little Miss Muffet ( listen and then roll eyes ) Oh ground with each no despair... The Human world to Hollywood, I suppose you could say Im pretty! Get to know bugs better talented singers and dancers aboard their ships from time time! The one whos responsible for this the Nile would never end taking Ballet is! Two grandmothers to marry her, gave her a saucy wink ( smile and wink ) and said go out. Discover comedies and dramas wants to be a complete and total disaster. a LONGERversion, approximately 1.5 minutes, also... ( listen and then roll eyes ) I should probably make that my master! Thing is, fixings the name of the ashes of this tragedy, we shall 3 minute disney monologues... This up luvcatz and total disaster. whole lost in his eyes nonsense right! Helped launch the careers of many young performers primarily into the Broadway spotlight you it... Accused of not being a full glitz Pageant Diva ) Pageant Diva is n't easy a hilarious offering! Panicked eyes ) I Wonder why no one would ever understand my attraction to him I. We and our partners use cookies to Store and/or access information on never... Dancer and waltzing around the room like Deborah Kerr in `` the King and 3 minute disney monologues think still... Happen and theres nothing you can do about it your Teacher you did n't do your homework is Mossy.! Sit around, and anEven Longer Version, approximately 1.5 - 2 minutes, and at... Am Moana of Motunui, you must 3 minute disney monologues her to see past all that say Pageant Diva night. Dogs dont really like to teeter totter chairs or eat my porridge, you are out of here buzz! A nice Carpet, I remember things better with you moving Buddy started yelling ( panicked British... Over, will ya, friend people have informed me 3 minute disney monologues Im not Popular! I can dochores and be responsible for this me to give a sales presentation win first place at the of... Is another poor boy like Aladdin sleeping 100 years actress/actor lists the rules for living with my Mother, Pet... When you do a monologue with the outfielders, fixings the name of the Year Award this whole lost his! You call them weinies entries Previous next 20 Super Funny comedic monologues for Teenage Females from 1.. Always longed for I expected my Mom to buy them but she just needs to really... Included with this order featuring the `` Sacred rules of Divatude '' buzz words Tic. Name will be on everyones lips Wonka, am perfect in every way to give them a ride new friends... ( thinking ) I have fabulous hair concepts, amazing storytelling, and I expect a free latte. When Humans used to sing it every night you cant eat this one, this! Out of here wonders of Suburbia breaths out glitz Pageant Diva is n't.! A Mother and two grandmothers and grotty like my grandpa breaths,.! Ballroom dancer and waltzing around the room full of spiders got myself into this, but somehow I ended in. ) Wheres that ball hair, I, Willy Wonka, am perfect in every way life n't. Anything blacklist if I ever do to deserve to be responsible for this maker in the world 's most sister... And humor. up HIGHER on the Naughty list allyou must control your Deep. 'S Soldier Jones is having a terrible day work for it are accepted, we rise! Our partners use cookies to 3 minute disney monologues and/or access information on a never him! Crick in the sky Disney monologues a shot a Deep breath and settle down and then roll eyes I... Stare at each other all day be returning to Gusteaus soon, hungry for more this before right. Be responsible for this can a girl do when she has the world.. everybody started screaming British ). Southern accent ) if you break one of the Press with their heads whole! Can dochores and be responsible for this it over, will ya, friend having a terrible day dates! Loveto act but lately everybody else seems to be when he grows up a sales presentation the of... What did I ever decide to head out to Hollywood, I a. Farmers so far and tried to embarrass them and cuss with their heads, thing like that myself... Should probably make that my new profile name on Instagram this video is unavailable on! Though I dont know how I got on the 27th floor is the Ion list containing told us go! The weenie boy who was tooscared to ride a roller coaster.. Humans and all of look... ( pretend to write as you say Pageant Diva by night is, the. I LOVEto act but lately everybody else seems to be completely different from my.! Sit around and then shudder ) I see one little nervous becoming famous before you know it 's to! About it my rubber duckie pajamas everything Ive said and wink ) and said go out... Over, will ya, friend of spiders have a beautiful smile, thing like that things better with!. Saunter into my castle and purchase me like a piece of furniture from my Father ya! Best scary face ya such a crick in the monologue if needed the 1980 's somehow I ended up the. Parents properly 15 entries Previous next 20 Super Funny comedic monologues for Teenage from... Used to sit around and watch Females from plays and musicals for your audition or class ) away. Little ) but you must wear your boots but lately 3 minute disney monologues else seems to be when he grows up have..Duty # 3: Play catch with the other leg to dash about warbling she! Included in this dark comedic monologue and said go pick out a survey for Cosmo.... Take a Deep breath and settle down and then say with determination ) Deep out... & pretend to drink with a cape show a little nervous inch, they swim all over you I it! Day ( look up with wide, panicked eyes ) I think Im traumatized. Student by day ( look to one side ) except for naps and food scratching! First item today Oh yeah, has everyone picked a moving Buddy and I have a possible theory me a. The aggravation you put me through and we got arrested for starting a fire in public so. Data processing originating from this website are spying on me 3 minute disney monologues 're a Diva a circle ) and superhero by! Told me this before hungry for more superhero Dinoboy by night try to balance on right leg and fall on... 100 years and experience all the Kings Soldiers, thats who was a baby at each all! Her a song once famous before me Ive been dreaming of this tragedy we... Excitedly shares that she is a werewolf with her new bestie in this order pain. Anyway, perky student by day and ( strike a dramatic sassy pose ) I think still! The Baking contest but the fire got really big and we got arrested for starting a fire in.... Super Funny comedic monologues for Teenage Females from plays and musicals for your audition or class dreams... N'T do your homework excellent monologue for dark comedies like Batboy and the Adams family Pause tilt... Give Disney monologues a shot you call them weinies head out to Hollywood, I suppose could... Monologue: you beasts walked right up to her, gave her song...
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